pondering about my life

i'm currently in annoyed mode... am i where i want to be? am i doing what i want to be or am i thinking i want it to be?  for most of my life, starting late highschool or early college, i keep on asking myself what my goal in life is... ? what i would want to do? what my life means? what is it really all about?  and yet, until now, i have the same question? i have a feeling that i'll die one day and i have the same question on my mind?  so what have i done during these years that i have lived by... have i been happy.. yes i believe so.. did i find someone who i will love and take care of... yes also..  was i able to go to places, get work, buy things,, all of which is yes.   how did i do all these... i went with the flow... and God was just all good about it.  i have been very blessed and i have no complaints.. problem is i have to think of the goal, what i want, etc... and i don't know where to find the answer... should i go elsewhere and just ponder... i guess problem with me is i had people telling me.. "study hard, because you need it", "study well because these will be checked in college", "study this course because this is the demand", "do this, do that because its like this and like that",  so i really am having problems in determining what i really want to do, because it has always been do this and do that kind of way.  being able to accomplish stuff is made by circumstances and situations where i was forced to perform.  my thoughts are all messed up. so aside from going with the flow at the moment, im hoping for some big positive opportunity that will change my career life.   life.